Thoughts

My perspective is dented with a fresh coat of sanity.. The cues are more subtle and firmer.. I'm assessing and observing my new demeanor! These changes amaze me rather have a profound effect.. The reality bites are tangy and sweet. If this is what is being called self actualized?! Then probably I have found my calling.. This state of saneness is building up the feeling of high.. A state of being empowered. This mere consciousness of being there for self, being there for time and just being there is the new story.. The road's that I have already taken and revisited time and again are moments of the time that bring alive the things that I have grown out of.. The clicks on the timeline bring in the moments saved to be edited.. The puzzled person inside is unpuzzling itself! Unpacking the closed boxes of insight! I'm reliving and re-reading the infinite short stories that I'm writing for myself and the ones I had written earlier. The intentions being different.. The pr

Two decades back I came into your life changing your perception towards the same... God brought me to you rather he brought you to me... You brought me up with all your positive efforts, all your love and all your affection. As days passed I grew older and started building my own world slowly shifting away from yours.. Probably bringing my world into yours.. You realised the change and brought in an magical change, a change that opened the closed doors... The walls between us shattered and I came closer to you. At that time I didn't know that it was a good choice but now when I see it was the best thing that could've happened. As the people around me don't share this.. With each passing day and each passing moment I just thank god for bringing you for me... You're special as I eagerly wait to share things, tell things and just vent out whatever is going on. You've been my BFF all along. I know I don't believe in this acronym but it's true as had you not

The time i stepped into the class i felt like "i don't belong here." My gaze shifted from one group to another in a frantic effort to catch an accepting gaze. Then, my eyes fell on a bunch with a beaming smile but high on "ego". Gradually, i had a few people whom i could call my friends. Yet, my eyes would flicker towards you. I tried to utilize the skills i acquired to know more about you. But, i failed and left things mid way. Finally came a day when you approached me and with a little effort i saw a different you. We started interacting showing a different self everyday. As a group member left, you were a lone ranger in the scenario. I took you in and we ended up knowing similarities in one another. Barring the age difference, barring all odds i knew i had to work to save it all. As i worked i saw you took a step forward and we began moving at a fast pace. Spending time and sharing experiences, some nice, some bad.. Came a day when i was in a fix and

A bucketful of experiences.. When I look back I received unconditional support in my first job. Pampered by everyone!!!! I was able to learn and experience things which is going to stay with me for a long long time. I did things, made mistakes and even felt miserable at times. I think all of this made me a better person. The people I came across a set of people who kept me grounded. I met my partners in crime and to mention it that during those endless group sessions I came out of my shell. I miss you guys and somewhere I know I'll not be able to share the same with anyone else. P.S. you made me meet someone whose dear to me now! The months and weeks spent in happiness and tension. I was surprised to see how I started accommodating new elements. My mind probably repressed a few things making them just a facet of time. As, I now see myself assimilating the same I feel a little wise. I'm managing things even preaching a few to one's I meet.. Time takes a 360 degree tu

Courage is a hard thing to figure. You can have courage based on a dumb idea or mistake, but you're not supposed to question adults, or your coach or your teacher, because they make the rules. Maybe they know best, but maybe they don't. It all depends on who you are, where you come from. Should you always do what others tell you to do? Sometimes you might not even know why you're doing something. I mean any fool can have courage. But honor, that's the real reason for you either do something or you don't. It's who you are and maybe who you want to be... A person's will and decisions make him/her build up the courage to face things the hardest way. Finding courage in the tiniest of things or moments to face the hard reality is the real deal. Keep pushing yourself, motivating yourself and build up the strength to face the reality.. Introspect yourself and find the truth... I found my moment of truth and my moment of courage when i had to push myself hard t

A complex soul always searches for simple activities... A simple soul always tries to make it to a level up! When we have tried and tested all our efforts on a cumbersome topic, we always wish it to be simple and easy... At last we do resort to things that are funny, weird yet a little less complex than the ones already tried.. Such issues are trivial yet they hold significance... They help me and I hope a few people out there seek an unusual answer to the hardest of questions.. The "road less traveled" is the one that does provide you with exceptionally simplest yet novel ideas... A simple approach does help me broaden my purview.. It does me stand out even when I'm part of the crowd.. While talking to a dear friend of mine, I realized that we are ready to go to an extreme extent to find a good night's sleep.. We do find ways to find that cushion that will support us and save us from the troubled future.. Just adding a little salt to a bland dish makes it tas

As a school's community service I went to a Senior Citizen Home, being naive at that age I didn't know why there were all those Old People had been staying there and why had their families not kept them with themselves! Later as I grew up and knew the harsh realities of today's scenario (LIFE PER-SE) and was looking for employment I came across an organization which was working wonders with Old People and had been bridging the gap of communication between the two ages. Still, there is friction and harshness between our set of generation and our previous generation, we leave or want to leave our grandparents, except a handful of few who feel the need of them. While surfing the net I came across a picture of an old man who is having dementia and is left  to wander on streets and no one is caring a damn to help him. And it's just not our grandparents, it's also the children, and nature that is facing the ire of our inhumanity. We don't care or even want to car

It's a phase when i'm unable to pull myself together and concentrate on things that are part of my routine.. And all of this is not because of the stereotypical reason of someone or something.. It's a time when my thoughts are wavering and are finding a new avenue where i can see myself or place myself.. These are one of those days when i like sitting alone or just passing time without meeting anyone, without a goal.. It's the phase where my mind is actually cleaning itself and setting its goals.. I'm neutral!!!!! Yes! there was a time when i had taken myself into a shell for things i had lost and was unable to disclose things to everyone i knew and trusted.. The time passed and i regained my conscience, i revisited the things i had moved away from and left behind and evaluated that some things had to retained and some things were better closed! Yes! there was a time when i was still holding onto things that were already dusted and rusted.. Which eventually van

A memory can haunt you for the entire lifetime... The exact version plays in my mind like a broken tape recorder repeating those instances like they happened just a moment back.. The things i fear the most have come in front of my eyes and i can see the worst in everything around.. It's beautiful too as my mind has definitely captured quiet many moments that came all these years, all those smiles, funny moments, high moments with family or friends. All these people and moments do have had their effect on me through thick or thin.. They made me travel through my own road less known to me.. Let me have my own set of adventures.. The rough patches, the bad mood days and the list is endless.. These times did have their own charm as I saw a different part of me, a part that i didn't experience generally.. Now as I look back and see I laugh on those instances that made me give those expressions.. I see how immaturity brought a new level of maturity.. All tiny instances made up

A date 14th Feb.. And a day of love as stated..  A week of Valentine's... Ah I wanna say that can have a taste of it too?? But my heart says you already have it everyday.. The smell of roses, the proposals I make to myself and others, the chocolates I give and eat, the teddys I have, the endless promises I make and break, The hugs I have received and given, And the unlimited kissies in my lap.. All of it have brought itself the hopeless & die hard romantic in me & probably everyone else too :) The D Day has love all over the place.. It's all red and full of colors.. All the movie channels showing love like never before.. Ugh im in the category of people who are involved in fantasy hopeless romance... The cherry on the cake is the rain, the tiny droplets on the cars windscreen or my window pane just adds to the lovely aura.. I'm having coffee in one hand and a romantic novel in another, my bag has temptations (rum and raisins), some red roses and my diary.. The thu

9 years ago we met, naive and having our own perceptions... We were among the first few to inhabit the place that became an integral part in shaping our lives. Gradually we got to know one another and we cemented our relationship with trust and understanding along with a unsaid loyalty that we will stay with each other no matter what.. A time came when we both wavered from each other and took a different direction and found other people better.. Yet after sometime when you realized that it was a roller-coaster ride you came back with a happydent smile.. The space we shared and still share has been lovely, with all those meetings and time spent we saw the world with new glasses everyday! The new hideouts that we found and even those celebrations had a different meaning altogether when you were there..  The things we shared, the fun we had, our sneak-outs, our cake baking, pizza making, unlimited coffees, runaway movies, those porno talks, or even spiritual ones were always

The bright lights, The colored sky... The silence of the night, The sleeping class deep in sleep... The subconscious and unconscious world at play bringing out what I only see at this hour of the darkness!!! Last night while dreaming I saw myself feeling a myriad of emotions. All of them made me pass through the different contexts attached to them.. There were no rules, no boundaries and no limits, I could stay there till I wanted to. Sitting there all alone I refreshed those times which are already present and will be coming... The images were vivid and their presence itself was breathtaking! It all felt like I had imprinted upon time and it all was just a glimpse of things that might arrive. I was flying, falling and sailing through those feelings that had laid themselves upon me and were now hatching their little videos of their own. In my subconscious I know there are few things that make their presence felt even during my conscious state and that's what my gut says! The o

Photographs, books, newspapers cuttings, love-letters, trophies, certificates are a gateways to our past and present. Its a fun trip down our memory lanes :) It is a collection that is brazenly positive, built with a sense that the goodness, which it encapsulates, is meant to transcend time and pour itself out for generations to behold. They are triggers for pleasant memories. All this is part of our mind and is seen through our eyes! Our eyes are said to be the windows of the soul and they truly are, they can either make us look dull or gorgeous! Our pictures say it all, we just need a "say cheese" for it.. A smile worth a million words and eyes telling it all. If you want to look within yourself just go in front of the mirror and see your eyes they will provide you with all the answers you require. Looking deep into your eyes or another's, can be an uncomfortable experience because not all of us are prepared for the reality revealed. If we try to dwell deep withing

We breathe, drink and eat expectations... The thoughts be it concrete and abstract are expectations. They are with us day in day out and mold our perceptions towards life! There are times when you find yourself stuck in a cycle of doom, these expectations help us take charge of our life once again.. Each and Everyone of us have our own favorite collection of things, our own to-do lists and list of wishes. Those wishes are like our carry-bags or wallet that we all to stay afloat and complete the things that we all wanna do in our entire lifetime. There are some of us who think expecting makes us over-think, stresses us and even lose our own-self with time. But, No! it is what makes us who we really are and what all we want to achieve. We all wonder "What If", "Had it not been like this" or "I wish".. Why think like this? And why let these If's govern us??? We can very well find courage to be the change and get things we want in life.. . Follow

I'm at crossroads and things seem to be in total confusion, I have to take a decision which will be life altering. My observation in this is that whatever decision we generally take during this time are 90% correct.. Finally i decided and set the pressure off. Its liberating yet a part is missing.. I smiling, following my routine, completing my tasks, socializing, Still something is unsettled inside.. Oh No! It is still YOU.. I have to finish you, chuck you out. Unknowingly - Knowingly things are shaping this way that i have accomplished my challenge. Now, i'm free but i'm confused.. I'm trying to figure out my steps ahead. Should i do this?? Should i not do this?? Oh, no!! I will end up the same way... All of them are saying this is right, get into this. But will i be able to do justice??? I'm in the dilemma of hurting someone's feelings in my way of happiness.. I don't wanna screw someone else's life for this happiness.. I will wait

The issues are visible, the complications are visible..... yet there is denial. There is a ready-made solution, an alternative path still i'm denying it. We're leading our lives even after being aware that things are different. We all know that the honeymoon phase doesn't last forever.... Still i'm clinging to it. Holding the only thread of my own hope that yes, i can accommodate and adjust to the changing times and mind.. There is drama, melodrama, and ironically Comedy.. As everyone around me is only stating the only word that i'm escaping from, that i'm denying. I don't want to come to this conclusion so soon. Dammit i lend it everything i had ever thought of. All my hopes have been pinned to the fact that the magic will return. The scratches and dents are now visible yet i'm denying to burst my own bubble. At last i find my knight who listens to me and understands what i really want. We chalk out somethings, make amends, do some homework